Crusty Orange

Why hip-hop music should be made illegal.

If you have ever turned on the radio, and browse for your favorite station, and happen to hit a pop or hip-hop/r&b station on your way…don’t stop. If you attempt to listen to it for more then 5 seconds, your brain might explode. Although this has not been proven scientifically, don’t think it won’t happen, because it will . Pop music today sucks. I don’t understand why that crap is still allowed on the radio. I use to be a fan of that music….I mean who doesn’t enjoy something up beat which is easy to dance to. It makes moves like “making the pizza” or “going shopping” look somewhat alright around others, and you could even do a basic two step to not look like a complete failure…but the stuff they play over the air today shouldn’t be called pop music. I think it should be called “Hey…I can repeat the same line over and over again”

I was at the gym the other day, and of course, those places have it set to one radio station: pop stations- they are neutral ground for wanna-be Iron men and the old guys who are kidding themselves. This new Justin Timberlake song came out of the speakers and within two minutes I was done with my workout. I literally had lost my motivation to exercise because my brain was slowly deteriorating by listening to that garbage.

Honestly, has anyone ever counted, how many times they say “girl” or “baby”. Every other line is “…blahblahblah girlll” or “…icantsing babyy“.




If you have been told that bands like N’sync split up because some of the members wanted to go solo, or that Lance Bass is gay, you have been lied to (besides the fact on Lance Bass). The group split up because during a lunch outing, a radio station had their song playing, and each member, unknowingly, said they could not stand the music. Shortly after they were told by their agent that the song over that station was in fact theirs and after each member ran off in a different directions, they never to be together again. The end.

Apparently the Backstreet Boy’s are back too. Wooppie! Now I can sleep again.

Frankly, it made a lot of sense when we found out some of their members had problems with alcohol and/or drug addictions, because I don’t understand HOW anyone can sing that shit without being cocked. I was surprised to find out that it was only 2 of the five, and the other 3 members were sober on stage.

It’s quite odd, as all of these men have to be in late 20’s early 30’s, but are still allowed to serenade 12-13 year old girls. When Michael Jackson (also a music performer) invited a couple other young actor’s to his estate (Neverland), he found himself with lawsuits up the wazoo. Then again, I’m sure if you played thriller backwards, it has all the names of the children Michael has been with. It has to be there…the song is 15 minutes long.

But, we still allow these masters of music to create similar suggestive material, such as Timberlake’s “Dick-in-the-box” skit on SNL. Rumor has it that the video was created to be his new hit single to suggest his coming out of the closet but was canned by publicists when the whole “gay rights” debate was a heated battle.

It is my firm belief that this country will slowly become stupider as they further listen to the same junk over and over again on the radio. Justin, Backstreet Boys…and the rest of you young white admirers, i’ll try put it in your words you can understand:

Cry me a river (girl),

Because This I Promise You (baby),

That its Tearin up my heart (sweet heart),

Listen to your new debut’s

I ‘ll Never Stop (cookie),

To bash you al,l I try, (sexy-kins)

Its True that your music (angel)

Needs to go Bye Bye Bye.