Joseph Torre, 67, beloved father, manager, and Yankee scapegoat, went peacefully to be with his Lord and Savior on October 18 after a brave, seven-year battle with failed expectations. Torre previously served as manager of the Braves, Cardinals, and Mets before arriving in the Bronx in 1996, where he led his team to four World Series championships in five years. However, following a World Series loss to Arizona in 2001, Torre’s health slowly declined, culminating in his death Thursday morning. Though he is believed to have died of natural causes, authorities have not ruled out foul play, and have taken local businessman George Streinbrenner into custody for questioning. Torre is survived by his bench coach Don Mattingly, his closer Mariano Rivera, and his beloved lapdog “Derek.” Services will be held for the fallen manager all week on ESPN’s Baseball Tonight.
19.Oct.07 
Sports 
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Earlier this week, a high school in Cleveland, Ohio was home to a shooting, killing two students and two teachers with the addition of several wounded victims. The work was done by 14 year old Asa Coon who apparently was suspended at the time.
Although this is a national tragedy and I sympathize with the victims’ families, it pisses me off how shitty of a job our schools and administration do, especially after the incidents our country has witnessed before. It is my firm belief that Mr. Coon should have been employed for the U.S. government after the shooting, on a temporary basis, to enlighten the dumb assholes who are in charge of shit like this in our country.
Allow me to put this incident into a little more perspective for you readers who find my last comment a bit disturbing. Asa Coon was a suspended student immediately before the time of his shooting; the reason…a fight with fellow students. His star-like personal record harbors a juvenile court neglect case at age 4, as he came from a poor home and routinely showed up to school unkempt. When he was 12, our Daun Waun was charged in juvenile court with domestic violence, accused of attacking his mother…all fine qualities of a respectable young man… He kept up with the latest fashion, sporting a black trench coat, black boots, a dog collar, chains and a glove.
Does this sound normal to you at all? If the answer is still yes…heres the kicker. He made direct threats the week before to blow up the school and stab students. <– This should trigger the reaction: “Holy shit, holy shit, get this kid some help.” But no, apparently it was something to brush away, as a remark from such a fine student should only be taken so lightly.
There are only two guys I know who wear a single glove. The first being a homeless crazy man who walks the streets downtown, and second Michael Jackson. The latter of the two gets a lot of attention so why didn’t this kid.
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12.Oct.07 Politics/Government Comment (1)
According to The New York Times, marriage rates in the United States are at their lowest point ever, with less than 50 percent of American adults choosing to tie the knot. While Bible-thumping Wonder Bread fans across the Midwest pray to Jesus for an end to this alarming trend, I personally applaud it. Marriage is an archaic, outdated institution designed to torture the spirits of men everywhere. A lifelong, committed marriage is like Robin Williams’ career. Sure, it was kind of fun in the beginning, but after thirty years of the same old shtick you just want to lie down in a ditch and die.
Every day at work, I see the same married couples dining in awkward silence, looking about as lively and enthusiastic as Terry Schiavo in her final week. They’re like the zombies in a George Romero movie; sluggish, vapid and slowly rotting from the inside out. If I ever wake up naked next to a seventy-five year old woman (again), I’ll hit the liquor cabinet so hard they’ll have to wring my liver out like a sponge. After all, everyone already has a lifelong sexual partner…its got five fingers and doesn’t guilt-trip you if you go a little early.
Since I first learned about sex ten years ago in that Kids R’ Us dressing room (I was seven years old, you bastard!) I’ve come to appreciate what a spontaneous, liberating rush it can be. The constant search for new and interesting sexual partners is one of the most natural human activities. After all, we’re only a few generations removed from the apes. Monogamy is an unrealistic expectation for a species descended from furry shit-throwers (no offense to Robin Williams.)
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08.Oct.07 General Comments (0)
If you have ever turned on the radio, and browse for your favorite station, and happen to hit a pop or hip-hop/r&b station on your way…don’t stop. If you attempt to listen to it for more then 5 seconds, your brain might explode. Although this has not been proven scientifically, don’t think it won’t happen, because it will . Pop music today sucks. I don’t understand why that crap is still allowed on the radio. I use to be a fan of that music….I mean who doesn’t enjoy something up beat which is easy to dance to. It makes moves like “making the pizza” or “going shopping” look somewhat alright around others, and you could even do a basic two step to not look like a complete failure…but the stuff they play over the air today shouldn’t be called pop music. I think it should be called “Hey…I can repeat the same line over and over again”
I was at the gym the other day, and of course, those places have it set to one radio station: pop stations- they are neutral ground for wanna-be Iron men and the old guys who are kidding themselves. This new Justin Timberlake song came out of the speakers and within two minutes I was done with my workout. I literally had lost my motivation to exercise because my brain was slowly deteriorating by listening to that garbage.
Honestly, has anyone ever counted, how many times they say “girl” or “baby”. Every other line is “…blahblahblah girlll” or “…icantsing babyy“.
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02.Oct.07 Entertainment Comment (1)
